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Okay,
so I'd been planning on having a "Spring is Here" party for
a really long time...the only problem was, spring still hadn't really
shown up. So when my dear friend Emma Taylor asked me if we could have
her 30th Birthday party at my apartment, we decided to turn it into
a "Emma's 30th Birthday/The Weather's Sorta Nice" all-out
bash.
We were going to have it over the weekend, but then we realized it was
Memorial Day and that most people would prolly be out of town. So we
said "Fuck it. Let's have it on Wednesday and see who's hardcore."
Before we get into the party pics, there's a story that needs to be
told.
This is Tamara. She's #1 because she showed up for the party early.
A week early. Picture it: it's around 1am on the Wednesday a
week before the party. I just had gotten home and all of the sudden,
my door buzzer sounds. I walk out into the stairwell right outside my
door (I live on the 2nd floor) and I see my upstairs neighbor Mike standing
at the top of the stairs looking down at me. I figure he has guests
that rang my bell and his bell so I say, "Don't worry Mike,
I'll let them in." (Figuring they were Mike's guests).
I go downstairs, open the door and Tamara says "Hi, we're here
for the party." (She had her roommate with her). I'm like, "Oh,
okay - It's upstairs." (Pointing in the direction of Mike's floor).
I run up the stairs and go into my apartment (the door shuts behind
me). I go into my room and shut the door. A second later, I hear someone
talking to me over the music I had playing - I figure it's my roommate,
Victoria, asking me who was at the door. I walk out of my room to tell
her that they rang our bell by accident and I walk out to see Tamara
and her roommate standing in my living room.
Tamara says:
"We're here for the party!" (holds up bottle of vodka triumphantly).
Me (confused):
"Um, okay. I guess it's upstairs."
Tamara: "Emma's
party?"
Me (not making the connection):
"Um, okay. I guess it's upstairs." Tamara:
"But I recognize you from the
invite in the picture with Emma."
Me: "Emma
Taylor?"
Tamara: "Yes."
Me: "Oh, that party would be NEXT
week."
Tamara: "Ohmigod." (covers face).
Me: "Doh!"
Tamara: "In that case, could you put
this vodka in the freezer?"
Me: "Sure."
Tamara: (Turns. Leaves my apartment in
a hurry).

People started showing up around 9ish and by 10pm the place was already
starting to fill up (as evidenced by this shot of my living room).

The party was during Fleet Week and these two sailors wandered in off
the street and asked if they could stay and hang out. We were happy
to oblige. (By the way, how great is the light up flag in the background?).

Around 10:30, the living room was getting over-crowded and people started
spilling into the guest bedroom (Big Daddy, Fatty and Sarah pimp by
the window).

Jenny, Jamie, Donna, Peter (looking a leeeetle tipsy) and Mike had all
been at pre-party office drinks and showed up ready to throw down.

Moments earlier I had introduced Sarah and Jim and Sarah goes "Oh,
we've met." Jim, "We have?" Sarah, "Yeah, at Max
Fish. You were real drunk and when we left you tried to make out with
me at the subway." Jim, "Hmmm, that sounds about right."
Ten minutes later and Big Daddy's still standing in the same exact spot
(I wonder how much of that had to do with the cutey in the short skirt
in the background? Hmmmm? Too bad Colin kicks it to girls about as well
as I play the French Horn. Booo-yah!).
Ken Midore, Dave Groise (The Ladies Choice) and Josh Teixeira.
Xiomara, Priscilla and Marisol rolled on up in this piece.
Hey! Remember "The
Ass?" (If not, you must take immediately take a time out from
this entry to go back and read about him. Just click here,
don't worry, it'll open into another window for you.)
All caught up? Well then you're probably thinking to yourself "Wow
Brian, how in the world did The Ass (who's real name is Stevie, I'd
like to add) end up at your party?" I'm glad you asked.
Most of you know that I work for an online dating company. One of the
people who reviews the profiles when they're created came across Stevie's
profile and emailed it to my attention. I emailed Stevie through
the personals and sent him a link the aforementioned diary entry (when
I dragged him out of Lombardi's to photograph his ass). He thought the
pics were hilarious so I invited him to the party. And he came! AND..
...this time he made sure to wear pants that can only be described as
"ass-a-liscous!" Grant Stoddard kneels down so he can appreciate
it in all its full glory.

My living room at 11pm. Not a bad turn out for a Wednesday, eh? Who
woulda thunk?
Who's this skinny guy? Newly slimmed down David Forman stopped by with
his main lady, Ramit.

Me, Grant and my roommie, Victoria.
Grrrrrr-reat foookin' Scott! It's Jack foookin' Wrrrrr-right, innit?

Dave Groise chilling like a blonde Fonzie ("Heeeey!") leans
in on Natasha, Karen Landes and Karen Marsala.

Vin get berrated by Grant for looking "too white."

Look at this crew that showed up all at once! From L to R: x, Anita,
Hillary, Tiffany, x, Jack, Sarah (aka - Sunny Juggz) and Grant.

"Hey Slim! What did you do with our friend?"

The blonde girl on the right is Ali. Everybody else - ??? (bonus points
to Big Daddy for pulling that face in the background).

Grant and Nina!

Priscilla, Mari, Grant, Xio (and again, bonus points this time to Jim
Jazz in the background).
Virginia (on the right) with two people I don't know.
Sarah Landy knows how to pinch a titty - that's fer sure.

The view from out on my bedroom's fire escape.

Around midnight the party was in full effect and... (go on to Part
Two, trust me, it gets good.)
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