| ugly-face karaoke | december 1, 2005 |
December turned out to be all about me getting everyone I know to make the ugliest face possible; so it's only fitting that on December 1st, I sang karaoke and asked people to make ugly faces.  So I'm sitting home, minding my business (aka - probably dorking out on xBox) and I get a text from Gurj: "Karaoke! Me, Ellen and a buncha girls. 2nd & 2nd! Come now!" I mean, how could I turn that down? I threw on a coat, and in a matter of minutes I was there! Here's me with with Ellen and Gurj who'd had a few drinks and were primed from some 'roke!  These were two of Gurj's friends who were in the middle of a song when I showed up.  Afterwords, Gurj and Ellen were up for a duet! (Something by The Killers if memory serves).  Here's me wearing Gurj's two-finger "SUPERFOX" ring while Gurj is giving me the one-finger.  As soon as they were finished singing, Gurj immediately whipped out the book to find another song to put in. She ended up going with Gwen Stefani's Holla Back Girl because during the chorus we all get to shout "Because I ain't no holla back....GURJ!" Hahahaha. After songs were selected, there was nothing to do but listen to other people sing, drink our drinks and, oh yeah...  ...take PROM PHOTOS! Here's me with prom-date Ellen!  And here's Gurj and Ellen as those "alternative" girls who went to prom together!  Before getting full-on into the "show me the ugliest face you can make" game, I figured we'd warm up with the "flare your nostrils and hold them open as long as you can" game. While I'm good at making ugly faces, I'm not so great at the whole nostril-flaring thing.  Ellen, however, was a natural! Check out that triangulation up top!  But, Gurj ended up taking the cake! Check out that form! Stellar!  With the warm-ups over, it was time to make some ugly faces. Here's Ellen going for the classic "I smell dogshit" face! Nice!  Gurj went for a more modern interpretation of the "pushing a big dook" face.  I busted out my best "float-eye"...  ...and Ellen countered with a severe "I'm a Level 64 Night-Elf and I also L.A.R.P. on the weekends" elf-ear! That's some advanced shit!  Here's me trying to show Ellen my secret weapon: The Disappearing Chin.  I can't remember if this photo is an attempt of Gurj and Ellen's friend to join in the game or whether she just really disapproved of how lame we were being. Hahah.  Here's me showing the girls one of newer, experimental faces. I call this one Dr. Dry Lip.  Then I showed off one of my old favorites. This is the stretch-face with a floater-eye thrown in for good measure. Ok ladies, your turn!  I love how Gurj goes from looking like an Oompa Loompa when she does smoosh-face to looking like...  ....old school Missy Eliot when she does stretch-face. Hahahahahaha. (Gurj, you even have the right earrings on!)  Hahahaha.  So we were so totally caught up in making faces that we pretty much forgot about karaoke at least until a professional Frank Sinatara impersonator hit the stage and busted out some Frank.  Not only did he sound spot-on, he even looked a WHOLE lot like him. It was like being in the room with Ol' Blue Eyes himself (you know, except with a whole lot less-women being beat-up).  Then Gurj finally got called up to do her "Holla Back Gurj!" It was awesome!  Then I sang a duet with one of Gurj's friends. (Probably either Total Eclipse of the Heart or Meatloaf's Paradise By the Dashboard Lights).  Check out our scary eyes: They're glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife. (Too bad I just realized I made that same joke about singing the same song almost 5 years ago. Jeez, maybe it's time I started picking out some new karaoke jams).  But in my defense, check the crowd reaction. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.  "Oh, hi there girl I just met! May I nuzzle your bubbies?" (PS - Check out Frank in the background looking for a woman to womanize). We ended up closing the place out and when we left around 3:30, we did the usual.  You know, rode the horses outside of the Punjab Deli on the corner of 3rd and 2nd...  ...then just kicked back and relaxed on some trash on the street. Hahah. I love you, Gurj & Ellen! |
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